COCK

My boss is very polite when she asks if I wouldn’t mind taking off the bright red heart-shaped button with “COCK” written in big black capital letters in the center. It’s hard to hide my blush as I quickly remove the pin. She assures me she has no problem with the button, but suggests that our farmers market clientele may find it a bit distasteful.

Fair enough.

I also have my doubts about this button. It’s a true fact, I do love cocks. I also, incidentally, love cunts. And I really don’t think twice when wearing my matching “CUNT” button, which occasionally affords me an opportunity to defend the word “cunt” as opposed to “vagina”, which means sheath for a sword (that sure is not what my vagina cunt is all about!). But in a world that so enthusiastically celebrates the penis, is publicly loving cock really so radical?

I feel like a lot of the world I live in is dedicated to loving the penis. There are penises in movies, phallic symbols in advertising, celebrations of male sexuality at every turn. Where I go to school, there is a giant, phallic protrusion in the middle of campus reminding everyone on campus of the power of the male penis (the Campanile at UC Berkeley also is a vestige of the institution’s imperial history; it was originally built facing what was then called “the Orient”, symbolizing the school’s mission to “civilize” or conquer Asia). Most of these representations, though, are made by men about other men’s penises.

Most of my life, I, on the other hand, have been told that I don’t love cock. As someone programmed as female for most of my life, I was taught that I didn’t have a sex drive, that I should love men but fear their penises, which are actually weapons men will use to steal my purity. And definitely no one ever even mentioned that women or other non-male people might also have these “weapons”.

When I wear a button proudly proclaiming that I love cock, I’m shouting back at all the people who ever told me I have a diminished sex drive, who ever told me cocks were no more than weapons, who ever tried to tell me what I want. I’m showing my love for all the cocks that stand up against patriarchy, the cocks that operate only with consent, the cocks on male people and female people and trans people and queer people that fuck with the gender binary.

Still, I’m conflicted. Maybe claiming a love of cock in general is to simplistic. After all, I don’t love the cocks that have been used to rape people, or the cocks glorified in phallic monuments to coercive political regimes, or the hyper-masculine cocks celebrated in media. Can the queer cock triumph over these cocks?

Maybe, maybe not. Either way, I’ll take off the COCK button at work.

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One thought on “COCK

  1. Your ❤ Cock button means what it means to you… and for you it means that you're not ashamed to show your love for cock, and to love it the way you see it. Natural love and pure sexuality carries no shame other than that which is imposed by others.

    Liked by 1 person

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